Monday, June 25, 2007

I'm sick and tired of having to explain myself even when this is a first.

Let me start by having you know that Prettig Apparel is no longer part of Bella Luna Studio. It started as an independant label but since Shahidah and I were working for Bella Luna [she still is], we thought it'd be awesome to have a business link to them. I joined Bella to help with PR, and this was way before someone in one of the bands showed an interest in me and definitely way before Prince Isobelle came on board.

It's been a long time waiting but I need to voice my opinion once and for all.

I am against that band for personal reasons I don't expect anyone to understand. I despise them. And folks, you can't judge me because I'm entitled to my own opinion.

It was only professional to be continuing what Prettig was aimed for with Bella and the deal that was discussed with them despite the continous internal struggle I was suffering from inside. So of course, the launch still went on and I flew to London a day after to commit to my family. Thus, obviously, I can't work for Bella Luna and have no interest in doing so, majorly due to the new band addition, which very much go against my dignity.

I brought it to myself, all this misunderstanding, these conflicts and the underlying hatred. People take sides and personally I never wanted to until it came to a point where I had to prove to someone I care for a whole lot more than the company. This is where my loyalty stays.

My loyalty stands with the person I love.

I might still have the company's t-shirt but I'll gladly return it. ''Conflict of interest'' sure fits my position right now and I sure as hell know where my interest is. My interest was and still is to make a business and to benefit girls. Purely nothing more, but somehow people point fingers and talk shit about all this. About my hypocrisy.

This has to end.

Now is the time to let go. We're going to deal with this the rational way.

I know it is harsh to leave people you regarded as friends behind but I don't want to put up fake fronts. I don't want to be holding on to people, I don't want a heavy baggage, I want to live life with no regrets. We're all mature, we need to get out of this so just let me out. Singapore is way too small for all this crap.

If we're real true friends, it'll show soon enough. I just hope, no matter who you are, you know how to live alone. You know how to survive the world alone. You don't need cliques, you don't need a company to restrict your beliefs, you don't need anyone but yourself. Because we live and we die alone.

I know we all worked hard to achieve what we aimed for. But someday, things will be gone. And now, I'll let Prettig Apparel go. I just can't work with someone who's too close with my enemy. As much as I know it has great potential, I also want my dignity back. So let me go, who knows maybe I'll see you again after many tomorrows.

I'm sorry Shahidah, from now on this will be your label. I'll hand everything to you. I know you can make this big, with or without me. The girls will have your back.

Me? I just fucking hate politics.

Monday, June 25, 2007 N